This blog post was originally posted over a year ago and was so popular that I thought I needed to share again.
The groom’s parents are often at a loss when asked about what role they will play at the wedding of their son. For whatever reason, it is always assumed that parents of the bride get more emotional during weddings. But that’s their baby getting married too!
Even though there isn’t much written about wedding etiquette for the groom’s parents, here are some basic guidelines to follow:
- If they haven’t already met, the groom’s parents need to initiate contact and start communication with the bride’s family. It’s a sign of respect and a terrific way to start up pleasant relations between both families.
- Even though traditionally they may contribute less financially, it’s the role of the groom’s parents to host and pay for the wedding rehearsal dinner. It doesn’t have to be expensive, although it should be similar to the actual wedding.
- The groom’s parents can also participate in the planning stage of the wedding. The level of input should roughly correspond to how much they contribute.
- No matter what, they are responsible for providing you with a timely, appropriate and accurate guest list from their side of the family.
- You will not find this in any etiquette books because it’s just a “southern” thing. The groom’s family pays for the bridal bouquet, groomsmen and ushers boutonnieres and mother’s and grandmother’s corsages/posy bouquets. I live by Emily Post Wedding Etiquette, but this is one thing that it does not say and just a “southern” thing!
Role of the Mother of the Groom
The mother of the groom has a fine line when it comes to the planning and executing of the wedding. There are some very important things that she should do, but her role is largely dictated by the role that her son and soon to be daughter in law encourages her to play, which include:
- The mother of the groom should call the bride’s parents first to congratulate them and introduce herself. She may want to invite them to dinner at her home or out to a special dinner as a way to get to know each other.
- She should work with the bride and groom to determine the number of guests and quickly provide them with her portion of the guest list.
- She should match her dress in style and color with the mother of the bride. It shouldn’t match exactly, but it should coordinate.
- She should coordinate accommodations and transportation for out of town guests that are on the groom’s side.
- She is also responsible for hosting the rehearsal dinner and invite everyone that plays a role in the ceremony. As for the type of dinner it is, it’s totally up to her. She can select either an informal get together or a more elaborate dinner.
- Lastly, she needs to introduce the family and friends on the groom’s side to the bride and her mother.