Monogram Etiquette for Weddings

Today I’m sharing all about monogram etiquette for weddings. As a planner your couples are going to look to your for etiquette tips and advice. That includes monogram etiquette and the proper way to use a monogram or crest. While couples can choose to honor the proper etiquette when it comes to monograms or not, you should always inform them of the proper way.

Funny story…back when I got married thirteen years ago my stationery designer (I didn’t have a planner) informed me of the proper way to use my monogram on my stationery. I cringe thinking about it now, but I was determined to use my new last name initial on my wedding programs and I did. That is definitely a no no in my opinion today! Although some couples feel the same way I did back then and still choose to use their new last name initial on their programs .

Monogram Etiquette for Weddings

Before the Wedding

For anything bride’s are going to wear, such as a monogrammed robe, dress patch, clutch, or bouquet wrap, they should use their maiden name monogram.

For wedding details that are used before the ceremony, such as save the dates, invitations, and ceremony programs, they should use their first initials. 

In general, a married monogram should not be used before the couple is officially married.

That’s why you see custom wedding monograms/crests with two initials instead of three.  

During the wedding

For couples that really want to use their married monogram with three initials it’s perfectly fine to do so at the reception.  They could have a custom three initial monogram for their koozies, on napkins, on their wedding cake, on the dance floor, on menu cards, etc.  

After the wedding

The exception to avoiding your married monogram until after the wedding is when registering for monogrammed items, since you’ll be using your registry gifts once you are married. Many stores offer monogramming on anything from candlesticks to cutlery, and in turn, these pieces may become heirlooms for future generations to cherish.

Tips on Monograms

  • When a bride is using her monogram before the wedding, whether it be on thank you note cards or whatever, she should use her maiden name monogram.  
  • For wedding monograms/crests couples should use their first name initials.
  • Married monograms should have the wife’s first name initial first, their last name initial in the middle, and the groom’s first name initial on the right.
  • Make sure you inform bride’s early on in the planning process about proper monogram etiquette because so many like to use their married monogram for patches they have sewn into their wedding dresses or on the robes they will wear on the wedding day.  

xo, Terrica


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